No matter how many times you blow your nose, there is always more snot.
Mouthwash when you can’t breathe is an exercise in futility.
Sadly, no physical law exists to keep a girl from suffering a nasty cold, a visit from Aunt Flo, and a pimple right under her bra strap all at the same time. Indeed, there is a law–Murphy’s Law–that instead dictates for such an occurence.
Attempting to be witty when you are brain-dead from irritation and illness is another exercise in futility.