I hate the term “politically correct.” It’s a misnomer, a slur that most people seem to accept at face value, but it’s in no way true.
If I say “African American” rather than one of the old, hurtful descriptors, I’m not doing it because a politician wants me to say it. I’m saying it because that is what a group of people wish to be called, and I, as a human being, respect the choices of others with regards to their identity. If I say someone is “African American” and he/she says “Actually, I prefer (Somali/Ethiopian/Nigerian/black/et cetera,” I will correct myself. I don’t find respecting someone difficult.
That’s why I hate “politically correct.” It changes the effort from “respect this person” to “be careful not to offend The Man!”
Hint: it’s not about “The Man.”
“Politically correct” makes it easy to dismiss simple respect. On an article about racist incidents at a traditionally accepting college, someone commented that it was probably a prankster who “got tired of the thick layer of PC around the place.”
Got tired of respecting the rights of others? Got tired of being pressured to treat everyone as human? Poor baby.
I do know that though I call it “simple respect,” that doesn’t always make it easy. I hang out in a really inclusive, supportive writing community online. If someone challenged me to find a kinder, more accepting group anywhere, I would be hard pressed to do so. However, some time ago our group had a big blow-up because someone with a mental disorder requested that others in the community be more conscious of their use of the word “crazy” and its ilk.
Many of these wonderful kind people were furious at being asked to be more “PC.” Were they not kind enough, wonderful enough? Some of them, with their own mental or emotional issues, chose to own the word, and were offended at being asked to use it differently. More were simply annoyed at “yet another word being off-limits” and at the subtle implication that they maybe weren’t behaving as awesomely as they could.
I still hang out there, but not as much. It’s hard to see people go on being hurtful in some misguided (to me) sense of acting out their freedom.†
“The right to swing my fist ends where the other man’s nose begins.” —Supreme Court Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
A punch to the nose will hurt pretty much anyone. I recognize that words are trickier. We all have words that affect us differently than they might others. “Home,” for instance, might to you be that cozy place where Mom always had a good snack and a willing ear ready, while “home” to someone else is that place they went when no one would let them stay, where bad things happened and the fear never let up.
We can’t know everyone’s triggers and sore spots. That doesn’t mean we can’t try not to hurt people, when we’re plainly told how to avoid it. No, we can’t ever succeed in never offending anyone. We can’t ever succeed in not-dying, either, but people still try to eat healthy and exercise despite the fact that none of that will let them live forever.
For Further Reading: Ableist language
† Please note: those who chose to own the word and define it for themselves have that right, I’m certainly not contradicting that. Others, however, who have no claim to it for themselves, could make an effort and have not.
I hate PC too, but for completely different reason. I hate it because it’s ridiculous and innatural, because it’s farce. There are some things that I personally don’t find offensive, but someone else does. But for what reason? Why if I call a white-skinned person “white” it’s Ok, but if I call a dark-skinned person “black” it’s not. I mean, black people DO have black skin, don’t they? And I don’t use this word to offend someone, because this word aren’t actually offensive. The same about Muslims. I can’t celebrate Christmas on public and I can’t wear my cross becase it’s “offensive” for Muslims! You think that’s the way it should be? Well, I find offensive the way they dress, make them wear european clothes! But nobody will make them, ’cause it’s “discrimination”. Well, I feel that I’m being discriminated, but they say it’s impossible – I’m white and Christian. Okeeeey… I continue, the women. If you open a door for a woman it’s not “politically correct”. If you make a compliment it’s “sexual harassment”. Are you kidding me? It’s called CHIVALRY, you idiots! It’s a polite thing to do! I don’t know whether you’re American or not, but I think that Americans are gone crazy with all this PC shit. Any normal person will treat minorities with respect and kindness, you don’t need some farcical artificial rules for it. But no, you make them, and now everybody hates all this. And I don’t agree with your opinion about PC – you think that PC should exist, just by other name or meaning, you think that to hate PC is the same as to be “tired of respecting the rights of others”. Well, that’s bullshit.
Yes, we certainly disagree. I know a good number of African Americans, and only two of those people could accurately be described as “black.” Most of them are varying shades of brown. I know natives of India who are darker skinned than children from Somalia. So why should I lump all of the persons of African descent together under a descriptor that’s wrong, and also not the term that many of them have reached a consensus about using? To protect my right to be an asshole?
I would ask if you’ve ever actually been TOLD you can’t wear a cross, and by whom. Because as a white Christian in a school with a majority of minorities, I’ve never felt discriminated against, but I’ve heard many a white parent make the complaint because their faith wasn’t front and center in everything we did.
I get a lot of the “I feel so persecuted because you said Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas!” whine. Then I walk down the road and Christmas everything is EVERYWHERE. Heck, walk into a grocery store in October, and there’s the Christmas section, a fourth of the store. Is it too much to ask that places like schools, that shelter and teach children of a wide variety of faiths, not point to one holiday/faith as better/more important than all the rest? It already happens due to the placement of the days–we don’t close school for Eid or for Hannukah. How is it discriminating against Christians that we NOT celebrate them above all others?
As to a compliment–if you say I’m very efficient at my job, it’s not sexual harassment. If you say I’ve got a nice ass, well yeah. That’s SEXUAL. See the difference? If you open a door for me, I’m fine with that. If you won’t let me open a door for you because I’m a woman–well, then we have a problem.
I don’t speak for all white people, or all Christians, or all women. But I still think it’s a matter of respect. Your respect for the wishes of the other person, and theirs for yours. Just because someone sometime didn’t respect you is no reason to never again respect anyone else of that particular ethnicity or religion.
…I had a comment here. It became a blog post. So I’m going to blog it instead.
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